by Journey Starke
He can be pretty mean. “But It's okay… Because he doesn't yell at me.”
He yells. “It's okay… Because he didn't cuss at me.”
He cussed. “It's okay… Because he didn't embarrass me in from of my friends.”
He makes you feel worthless in front of your friends. “But it's okay.. Because he isn't controlling you.”
He starts controlling where and when you do things. He calls and texts repeatedly when you're gone. “But it's okay.. Because he doesn't isolate me.”
He loves you so much that he wants you to spend time with only him, no one else. “It's okay… Because he loves me and he's not violent.”
He smashed his phone and punched a hole in the wall next to your face during an argument. “But it's okay… because he hasn't hurt ME.”
He grabbed your arm so hard it left a bruise. “But it's okay… Because he didn't really mean to and it wasn't a punch or anything.
He punched you in the shoulder and you cried. “But it's okay… because it wasn't my face.”
He backhanded you across the mouth and gave you a fat lip. “But it's okay.. Because he says he won't do it again. He loves me. And He's sorry.”
It's not okay. He will do it again.
These are all things that happened in my relationship and all my excuses that followed them.
Until I realized that NONE of that was okay.
It's okay that you love him, but it's not okay how he treats you. It's okay to miss him, but you don't want him back.
There are many resources and people to help you if you ever fall into this awful cycle. I didn't realize how bad my relationship was until I wrote this. I am trying to get out & writing some of my story this was was very therapeutic. All of you are so strong and so inspirational.
I'm finding my strength, I hope you are too. ❤️
Rachel Everhart RN